Monday, January 30, 2012

Sisters are different flowers from the same garden

It has been a while since I've had a moment to sit and reflect. And tonight my thoughts are of my sister.

Growing up we had what I always thought was a bit of a love hate relationship.  Definitely loving to hate each other. Although I have never said it to her, I would have loved nothing other than to give her the world, even then.

We didn't sit for hours sharing our hopes and dreams, or talking about boyfriends or weddings or babies. We did things together because we had to, because we were sisters. And perhaps given the choice we would have had nothing to do with each other. There was always a competitive aspect of our relationship too. Because we did all the same things it was easy to compare ourselves to each other. In my opinion I washed dishes better than she did and she dried them better than I, thus forever holding the "washer" and the "drier" roles. And she hated it! We were both sporty in our younger years, both horse riders and netballers. She was a far better netballer than me, and still plays several times a week. And whilst I hold the record of the most hospital visits after coming off my horse, she holds the record for the amount of times she came off, she is just like a cat though and mostly landed on her feet!

Today, several years on, both in our 30's, both married, both with children, both with careers, both with little at home business I consider the nature of our relationship now and how it has changed.

If I have news, who is the first person I want to tell? My sister. If I want a shopping pal, who is the first person I want to go with? My sister. Need to borrow something, who do I call to borrow it from? My sister. If I want to sit and talk for hours? Yep, my sister is the one I want to talk to. And right now I have something to say to my sister...

Dear Fleabag (never really liked that nickname you know!)

I am pretty sure I am about to tell you some things you have never heard me say, and for having never said it out loud I am sorry.

I think you are pretty special. And yes we don't and won't and shouldn't always see eye to eye, that would be boring right? I am so proud of what you have achieved personally and professionally. You chose a path and have dedicated your years to achieving just what you set your heart on.

You have a wonderful little family unit, and you are an amazing mother. Sharing the parenting in a shift working family is hard work - I know this only too well. It is hard hard work, and it means you don't always get to spend quality adult time with Mr Sister, but your children are benefiting from having you around alot of every day. Master 3 isn't always the easiest to deal with, and you handle it beautifully. Quite frankly I would have sat myself on the time out mat many times by now, but you just roll with it. I know a certain Master 10 who thinks you are a pretty fantastic Aunty, and more than certain that his little sister is going to think just the same.

Your dedication to your work and the committment you have shown with continually pushing yourself and furthering your studies, is something I wished I'd had the same dedication to do. I wish I'd had the same desire to go through uni and educate myself too.

The amount of time you spend playing that crazy knee damaging game perplexes me! Urgh I am way to old for that caper and just a little secret you are catching up ;p but I am glad that you enjoy it so much and I am glad it means you get some you time doing just what you want to do.

I am so very very proud of you for starting your little business and where you have taken it, I have enjoyed watching you craft and watching you grow. It is an absolute pleasure to be able to share that with you.

I need you to know that I am there for you. On a bad day, on a great day. I am there as a shoulder. I am no longer a sister but a best friend. I am the one you can sit for hours on the bed with and talk boy talk to. Any time of day or night, I am here with my hand waiting to take yours.

I have loved watching the little rose bud bloom into a beautiful rose.

I love you always

Your sister

So there I've said it, its out there. My sister makes me proud. Now to hope she's reading this and to be able to say it to her in person followed up with a great big hug.

"Sisters is probably the most competitive relationship within the family, but once the sisters are grown, it becomes the strongest relationship." ~ Margaret Mead